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Nostalgia for Today
This year has been hard. Really hard.
It’s like 2024 decided to be 5 years at once. Maybe it’s a tax thing.
Pro-blem? Existential Dread
“Pro-bleeeeeemmmmm?!?!?” she exclaimed, while sticking a microphone taped to a golden mannequin leg into my face.
I stare at her, my eyes wide, slightly panicking while scrambling for a better way to explain what I want to say. I draw a blank. I resign myself to saying “existential dread”.
Men Ruin Plans
They say when you make a plan, God laughs at you. Then, God then sends a man to ruin your plan!
My Home Alone Tasting Experience
Ever since I learned about it on Tiktok, I have always wanted to got to a Taste Film event. Unfortunately, they are based in the UK, so it’s going to require a little extra coordination.
Did ChatGPT just read me for filth?
I asked ChatGPT to scan through my entire website and then, based on the writing there, suggest some jokes I would make. Previously I’ve asked it to suggest blog posts and their suggestions felt like light roasts, so I was excited to see what it would come up with.
My 2022 Cinema Recap
In order to maintain my Platinum status at Cinemark, we have to watch 25 movies within the year. What I didn’t realize was that the free movies I get as a benefit do not count towards that total. So, here is a recap of the 28 movies I saw in theaters this year with their rating on the Negative 5 to 5 scale (starting with my least favorite).
33 Musings
Yesterday, I was challenged to come up with 33 “musings”. I chose to add to that challenge by writing down thoughts or assertions or jokes that are completely new - meaning I have not consciously created them or communicated them prior to yesterday.
My Subconscious is a Jerk: My Ongoing Battle with Sleep Paralysis
Have you every dreamt that you were paralyzed? That you couldn’t move any part of your body, or talk, or couldn’t breathe? That’s Sleep Paralysis.
Less is More: 5 Things that only work when I don’t think about them at all
I decided to think about things that I do fairly regularly that only work perfectly if no one is paying attention (and that includes me!).
Girls Gone Mild
A group of outcast girls at the WASP-filled Victoria Park co-ed Boarding School hatch a series of hare-brained schemes to rise up against their bullying peers.